Frances Fragos Townsend, the soon-to-be-former Homeland Security Adviser, says the U.S. should be at a heightened awareness for attacks (orange, red, fuchsia? What color should we be at now?) in 2008 going into election season. This coming shortly after the news that she would be stepping down- making her the latest in a long line of departures from the Bush administration.

Before she leaves the Bush administration in early 2008, Townsend said she wants to make sure that plans are in place to head off any potential terrorist threat before or after the elections for president and Congress and to ensure that there is “no lag in information sharing” between the Bush administration and the next occupant of the White House.

“We know that Al Qaeda” tends to view elections “as a period of vulnerability,” Townsend, 45, said in an interview. “I don’t know if there will be a particular threat, but we can’t ignore what we have already seen.”

Ignoring all the things that I’ve already said over and over about the fact that we pretty much gave up going after Al Qaeda so that we could go rumble in Iraq- how many times have we heard that we should be on high alert for attacks? Elections, Anniversary of 9/11 every damn year, the list goes on and on- and sounds like little more than continued fear mongering from the current administration.

Or perhaps the aim is something for more devious- if they see elections as moments of weakness, would it be within Bush’s monumentally increased executive powers to suspend the elections and continue holding the Presidency so the U.S. doesn’t experience any moments of weakness?

Hope I didn’t just put ideas into anyone’s heads…

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I’m a day late but never a dollar short. Well, sometimes. But that’s a whole other story. I present to you the 2nd installment of the weekly Evil Wrap-Up!

insert whip crack here.

Mitt Romney: Family values is his campaign coup de gras. In my opinion, family values should have nothing to do with a campaign’s focus. Sure, it’s important. Sure, Americans have fucked up family values. But what’s more pressing right now? Can Mitt change the American perspective on the family in 4 years? No. Can the war in Iraq end in 4 years? Sure. Can he change the parenting of millions of children? No. Can our health care system get an overhaul that could potential help care for those millions of children better? Sure. So maybe he’s not exactly Ahmadinejad. But anyone who blabs on this much about values must have a few secrets up his sleeve.

So THIS is why cases of Gonnosyphiherpilitits have gotten so high in the U.S.!!! Prison Sex is the same as unprotected sex, because authorities don’t want to give the impression that they’re encouraging sexual encounters between inmates- despite the fact that 2.2 million prisoners are held in facilities where man on man lovin’ is common, and the risk for STDs is higher than in the general population. Says Rep. Barbara Lee of California- ‘‘When more than 90 percent of incarcerated people return to our communities, taking a head-in-the-sand approach to the fact that our prisons have become a breeding ground for HIV/AIDS poses a serious public health risk.’’

McDonald’s wants to own your coffee business. Own It! “We want to move from beverages as an accompaniment to being a beverage destination,” said Don Thompson, McDonald’s prez, said in a meeting with analysts Tuesday. “Our speed, our convenience, the value that we can afford to customers without quality comprise will make us a formidable player.” The fast food giant plans to do this by offering lattes, mochas, cappuccinos and espressos with choices of different flavorings and milk. Industry watchers say the drinks cost about 50 cents less than at Starbucks. That’s right Starbucks- you go to hell. You go to hell and you die.

General Musharraf is likely going to stay President of Pakistan according to the newly formed Supreme Court of Pakistan, which was set up after emergency rule was put in place two weeks ago. He won the Oct 06th election, but has not been officially confirmed due to controversy over his eligibility, the argument being that you can’t run for office and be army chief at the same time.

Hate Crime incline. After a decade low in 2005, hate crimes jumped up 8% in 2006. Of course- that might be due to the 200 law enforcement agencies that reported last year, after having never reported before.

Like rats from a forever sinking ship. Frances Townsend, homeland security and counter terrorism adviser to President Bush for the past 4.5 years is stepping down. Making her the latest in a pretty decent line of high profile exits as Bush runs headfirst into his last year as Commander in Chief. There was no reason given for her departure.

Chuck Norris is- Walker: Border Patrol. Mike Huckabee, who’s sitting at the number two spot in the polls in Iowa, has decided to go funny with his campaign commercials. The ad opens with a black screen and white block letters, reading, “An Important Policy Message from Governor Mike Huckabee.” Then Huckabee appears, looking somberly into the camera. “My plan to secure the borders?” he says, as the camera zooms out to show Norris sitting next to Huckabee. “Two words. Chuck Norris.” The commercial then jumps back and forth from Huckabee to Norris. “Mike’s a principled, authentic conservative,” Mr. Norris says. Huckabee wraps it up by deadpanning, “Chuck Norris doesn’t endorse. He tells America how it’s gonna be.” Well, that’ll teach those pesky illegals.

American Presidents shouldn’t need to be “broken in” says Hillary Clinton. ‘‘There is one job we can’t afford on-the-job training for — our next president. That could be the costliest job training in history,’’ she said. ‘‘Every day spent learning the ropes is another day of rising costs, mounting deficits and growing anxiety for our families. And they cannot afford to keep waiting.’’ In Iowa, Obama (the obvious target for these remarks) was asked about Clinton’s comments and offered a sharp response. ‘‘My understanding is she wasn’t Treasury secretary in the Clinton administration. I don’t know exactly what experience she’s claiming,’’ he said. ‘‘Rather than just assert experience, if she has specific differences with me in regard to economic policy then let’s have that debate.’’ The former first lady compared the situation to 1992, when her husband ran against the first President Bush. ‘‘There seems to be a pattern here. It takes a Clinton to clean up after a Bush,’’ she said to applause. Now sure we here at Patriot Missive could make an easy wisecrack about various Clinton methods of cleaning Bush, but that would be taking the low road. And we’re better than that- so we’ll just allude to it (you’re already thinking about it aren’t you?) and leave it at that.

And now- from lewd innuendo, to the Frigid 50! President George W. Bush has been named the coldest person in Hollywood. He’s so cold he doesn’t even work in Hollywood- and still he managed to take the top spot. Impressive.

But wait dear reader- Dubbya is NOT the most evil thing in today’s article. No, the most evil thing is far more dastardly, considerably more insidious, dare I say it… this last thing makes Satan himself quake- Pure evil is… Sesame Street. No… really. I’m serious. The DVDs of Sesame Street: Old School Vol 1&2 carry a warning label- “Sesame Street: Old School” is adults-only: “These early ‘Sesame Street’ episodes are intended for grown-ups, and may not suit the needs of today’s preschool child.” Yes, that’s right, the show that taught us all how to behave as children, and continued to influence our development well past childhood into adulthood, is bad for children. Cookie Monster still only ate cookies, there was no Elmo, Bert and Ernie were still in the closet, a young girl walking the street alone was picked up by an older man and brought to his place to “meet his wife and eat milk and cookies”, there was pipe smoking, Snuffy was still a hallucination suffered by Big Bird… my god! What were we watching!?!?! How did we ever get by in a world so corrupt and morally devoid?!?!? I feel nostalgia slowly crumbling into a bleak abyss of doubt and sorrow for my generation.

*sob*

And there you have it folks! All the evil that’s fit to print.

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In a recently published and highly disputed report Detriot was named the most dangerous city in America, and somewhere Eminem is basking in his increased (though, no longer really valid) “street cred”.

The study drew harsh criticism even before it came out. The American Society of Criminology launched a pre-emptive strike Friday, issuing a statement attacking it as ‘‘an irresponsible misuse’’ of crime data.

The 14th annual ‘‘City Crime Rankings: Crime in Metropolitan America’’ was published by CQ Press, a unit of Congressional Quarterly Inc. It is based on the FBI’s Sept. 24 crime statistics report.

The report looked at 378 cities with at least 75,000 people based on per-capita rates for homicide, rape, robbery, aggravated assault, burglary and auto theft. Each crime category was considered separately and weighted based on its seriousness, CQ Press said.

After each catagory was rated, the cities were given “crime scores”. Zero would be the national average. Detroit sat at 407, with St. Louis nipping at it’s heels with 406. Maybe next time St. Louis. The lowest score went to Mission Viejo which rests in the affluent Orange County (or, the O.C. for those who love teen melo-dramas) who’s score was -82. I guess high school infidelities and nights of drunken debauchery don’t rate high on the scale. Or is that not what Orange County is really like. Eh, it doesn’t matter, I believe everything I see on T.V.

So why is there controversy about this list anyway? It sounds pretty straight forward.

Detroit was pegged the nation’s murder capital in the 1980s and has lost nearly 1 million people since 1950, according to the Census Bureau. Downtown sports stadiums and corporate headquarters — along with the redevelopment of the riverfront of this city of 919,000 — have slowed but not reversed the decline. Officials have said crime reports don’t help.

The rankings ‘‘do groundless harm to many communities,’’ said Michael Tonry, president of the American Society of Criminology.

‘‘They also work against a key goal of our society, which is a better understanding of crime-related issues by both scientists and the public,’’ Tonry said.

‘‘You’re not comparing apples and oranges; you’re comparing watermelons and grapes,’’ said Rob Casey, who heads the FBI section that puts out the Uniform Crime Report that provides the data for the Quitno report.

The FBI posted a statement on its Web site criticizing such use of its statistics.

‘‘These rough rankings provide no insight into the numerous variables that mold crime in a particular town, city, county, state, or region,’’ the FBI said. ‘‘Consequently, they lead to simplistic and/or incomplete analyses that often create misleading perceptions adversely affecting communities and their residents.’’

So basically, what they’re saying is this- just because a city has more rapes, murders, assaults, robberies, and the like- doesn’t mean it’s more dangerous than any other city. And also, if it is more dangerous than any other city- it’s bad to say because it means the people who are opposed to living in dangerous places and can afford to do so- will leave. Which of course means all that will be left are people who either don’t care about the violence and such, or they’re involved in it, or they want to leave- but can’t really afford to. Which creates a cycle of increases in such things, because there’s less decent folk around to do something better with the city.

Damned if you do, damned if you don’t? Eh, at least I don’t have to worry about where I live-

The study excluded Chicago, Minneapolis, and other Illinois and Minnesota cities because of incomplete data.

Sweet.

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From the Chicago Sun-Times:

An unknown person used Sen. Barack Obama’s presidential campaign Web site to send out threatening and derogatory e-mails to employees at a Texas-based company, according to a lawsuit filed by the company Friday in Cook County Circuit Court.

Like many Web sites, Obama’s has a function to “tell a friend” or “pass the word,” allowing a visitor to fill in e-mail addresses in the “to” and “from” lines.

The suit, filed against a John Doe and seeking in excess of $30,000, claims someone sent e-mails to all employees of CCR Technologies in September, each time claiming they were from the CEO.

What was the content of these messages?

The first e-mail, allegedly from CEO Tom Coyne, was packed with “many racially denigrating words and phrases,” and said “if they wanted to keep their jobs, they would support Obama for president and that they would receive a $5,000 bonus for their vote for Obama,” the lawsuit claims.

A follow-up e-mail, again sent via Obama’s Web site, again purported to be from Coyne and told all employees of the chemical technology firm that the office was closing and if they “would have been better employees [CCR] would have succeeded.”

CCR’s attorneys at Mayer Brown declined comment. Obama campaign officials said they were unaware of the issue.

More bad news for the Obama camp when paired with this little tidbit-

Triggered by an item in Bob Novak’s Sunday column suggesting that Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton has dirt on Sen. Barack Obama but won’t use it, Obama’s campaign Saturday accused Clinton’s team of using “Swift boat” tactics against him.

Obama sent out an e-mail calling on the Clinton campaign to renounce the item, which he said was “heavy on innuendo and insinuation,” adding, “The cause of change in this country will not be deterred or sidetracked by the old ‘Swift boat’ politics.

The 2004 White House campaign of Sen. John Kerry (D-Mass.) was savaged by TV ads undermining his military career, funded by a group called Swift Boat Veterans for Truth.

A reason the Obama campaign went on the offensive — or that any campaign might — could be to protect itself from material that could surface later.

Well, that could suck. Gotta love politics.

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Ok, now before anyone turns around and talks about how bias we are here at Patriot Missive, let me point out- we regularly acknowledge our leanings- not to mention- any source we pull our news from.  We link so you can judge the stories for yourself.

That said, news media giant CNN is on a roll the past few days. You most probably didn’t hear the story of CNN’s coverage of steroids in wrestling, however, CNN has been caught in the act of trying to edit an interview.  They tried to make it appear that former WWE champion John Cena said he does take steroids and he’ll never be caught.  When in fact, his statement about steroid use was he had “absolutely not” taken steroids.  But that wouldn’t be sensational. Luckily the wrestling organization thought ahead to get footage of the whole interview from start to finish and post it on their website.  It eventually prompted complaints and an eventual re-edit of the interview by CNN.

The interviews and more can be found here.

Of course the most telling quote from the whole story and aftermath comes from wrestler Cena himself:

“That was the thing that I was most hit with. This is a one-hour documentary on wrestling and as much as I like to think the world revolves around WWE because I’m so proud of what I do, there are bigger fish to fry out there like the war in Iraq, the presidential race, et cetera, et cetera. And if they’re messing with my quote for an hour documentary just to get the point across that they want the viewing public to think that we’re all on drugs, I can only imagine what they’ve done. It puts everything that they’ve done so far in speculation. In an honest news company that’s not the position you want to be in.”

Fair point, and one that makes our next story all the better.

There are very few political analysts more closely associated with the Clintons than James Carville, who was a key adviser to Mr. Clinton in the 1992 campaign.

So it’s no surprise that Mr. Carville’s appearance on a round table after last night’s CNN-sponsored Democratic debate is arousing some morning-after controversy.

Why controversy? What’s the big deal? Glad you asked. Carville is also an informal advisor to Sen. Hillary Clinton’s campaign for President. So by placing someone who is obviously biased onto the round table discussion- but not acknowledging his political business ties- it paints an unfair portrait for anyone who thought he was just another political analyst with no agenda.

But the agenda was made even more obvious when in addition to being very open with his praise of Clinton- he was also quite critical of Sen. Obama.

CNN’s Wolf Blitzer is also being taken to task for his overall handling of the debate- and especially the closing question for the debate, which had nothing to do with politics whatsoever.

Maria Parra-Sandoval, 22, a senior political science major at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, said she wanted to ask the Democratic frontrunner where she stood on the proposed Yucca Mountain nuclear repository in Nevada, an issue about which she said she wrote a paper as a finalist for a Truman Scholarship.

Instead, she said, CNN’s Suzanne Malveaux told her right before the end of the debate to go with the following question:

“This is a fun question for you. Do you prefer diamonds or pearls?”

The question got a big laugh, and Clinton answered swiftly:

“Now, I know I’m sometimes accused of not being able to make a choice.

“I want both.”

To a roar of applause and more laughter, moderator Wolf Blitzer closed out the night.

Doesn’t it just make you all warm and fuzzy? In a time where disclosures of planted questions and non-answers are drawing the ire of the American public- this kind’ve nonsense is the last thing any candidate needs, and the last the the public should really want. Mr. Cena- you wanted to know what else they’ve done- here are your answers.

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It’s still a small percentage when compared to the overall size of the U.S. Army, but statistics show that 9 in every 1,000 soldiers deserted in fiscal year 2007.

The increase comes as the Army continues to bear the brunt of the war demands with many soldiers serving repeated, lengthy tours in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Military leaders - including Army Chief of Staff Gen. George Casey - have acknowledged that the Army has been stretched nearly to the breaking point by the combat. Efforts are under way to increase the size of the Army and Marine Corps to lessen the burden and give troops more time off between deployments.

For those that found their way to this post because they were “researching” ways to leave the Army, here are your fast track options:

• They are determined unable to meet physical fitness requirements.
• They are found to be unable to adapt to the military.
• They say they are gay and are required to leave under the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy.
• They go AWOL

Can anyone guess what people are theorizing is the root of this desertion spike?

Oh, and as for the romanticized desertion to Canada that was ever so popular during the Vietnam war:

Just this week, the Supreme Court of Canada refused to hear the appeals of two Army deserters who sought refugee status to avoid the war in Iraq. The ruling left them without a legal basis to stay in Canada and dealt a blow to other Americans in similar circumstances.

The court, as is usual, did not provide a reason for the decision.

Bummer. How’s Mexico looking these days?

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“(Not) The Daily Show” can give you the low down-

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Do you like the news?  Sure!  Who doesn’t!?!  Well, you’re in luck-

As the networks run out of fresh sitcoms and dramas in the coming weeks, news magazines are likely to replace them. “The reality is that 48 Hours is the utility player for the network, a role we cherish and consider part of our core responsibility,” the CBS show’s executive producer, Susan Zirinsky, told today’s Los Angeles Times. The newspaper also noted that NBC is preparing to air as many as three Dateline episodes per week after the first of the year, while ABC is speeding up production of several Primetime series, based on the themes “family secrets,” “medical mysteries,” and “the outsiders.” However, one unnamed network producer noted that all of the shows will be produced with staffs that have been vastly reduced in recent years. “You’d love to use this opportunity to strut your stuff,” the producer told the Times. “But there’s not a lot of money and not a lot of time.”

Obama digs Google, and wants geeks to have seats on his cabinet-

Obama was asked by a Googler — that’s what employees are called — what he was going to do to get past his experience gap. Polls show that one of the biggest problems Obama, 46, has with voters is his resume.

“Sergey and Larry (Google founders)did not have a lot of experience starting a Fortune 100 company,” Obama said.

Obama used his Google visit to unveil his technology innovation agenda. If president, he would name a chief technology officer, guarantee every American broadband access, and make sure whatever is the next Google is a U.S. company.

Can I recommend, I dunno, condoms?

National figures revealed Tuesday showed that more than 1 million cases of chlamydia were reported last year — the highest number ever recorded for sexually transmitted diseases.

So remember kids- don’t be a sap, keep your jimmie wrapped!

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The 18 students who were suspended after a Nov 1st sit-in protest against the war in Iraq are returning to school this week after the threat of expulsion has been erased.

Of the 18 students suspended after a Nov. 1 sit-in at Morton West High School, 14 are due back today, Supt. Ben Nowakowski said in a statement. The remaining four, who Nowakowski said “bore more culpability for the disruption,” can return Friday.

“They did deserve some punishment but not eight days nor the threat of expulsion,” said Adam Szwarek, whose son was suspended.

“I don’t think [my son] made a mistake. There is still an issue here: the military recruiters that are allowed to run rampant throughout the school.”

But Nowakowski said the students severely disrupted the school day, forcing him to lock down classes.

He insisted the punishment had nothing to do with clamping down on free speech.

It remains to be seen what else may come about as a result of the protests and punishments, but at least for now the students can return to a place of education- where hopefully they will continue to learn and be informed and be proactive in the ever expanding world around them.

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And I’m not talking about the Jena 6.

I’m talking about the West Memphis 3.

For anyone who’s never heard of them despite:

• two feature length documentaries shown on HBO Paradise Lost, and Paradise Lost 2
• support by artists such as Pearl Jam (who’s singer Eddie Vedder has been known to substitute the words “Free the West Memphis 3″ into live versions of the song “Do The Evolution”)
• Metallica (who also provided the soundtrack to the two documentaries)
• Marilyn Manson (not always the best guy to have on your side in terms of publicity… but still)
• Henry Rollins (who produced the album “Rise Above” as a support album for the boys)
• a true crime novel called “Devil’s Knot” which has a film based off of it in pre-production
• and the fact that they’ve been serving either life inprisonment or sitting on death row for the past 15 years

If you’ve still not heard of them after all of that… it’s because they’re victims of a prejudicial system of a different sort.

Read the full story

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Watching Sen. Hillary Clinton lately has been like watching a baked potato rotate in the microwave for a few too many minutes. The tides have begun to change for the political juggernaut that is Mrs. Clinton. In the last month she’s been busted planting questions in an audience before an event and giving opposite opinions about licenses for illegals.

Now this. Some are crying that it’s an omen to the fate of America if she’s elected President. Some say that it’s exactly the sort of sign we needed to make our final decision about the Hillmeister. I say, the madness has just begun. Each candidate will have their turn in the political grind and I think she’s just getting her embarrassing moments out of the way before the boys.

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Patriot Missive salutes all soldiers, sailors, marines, and airmen (yep, even the air force) on this Veterans Day 2007.

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